Moved in and Getting Settled...

So, our stuff came 7 days ago. Most of it, anyway. Our "hold baggage" - the small shipment, less than 1000 pounds of last-minute stuff - hasn't arrived yet. Traditionally, that one is supposed to arrive first. That's how it's designed. Not ours, though. It's supposed to come this week, but I'm still holding my breath. (It was promised 2 weeks ago.) That shipment has my Kirby vacuum in it - and I need it! :-)

There was some damage in this move. Furniture, to be exact. I am not happy about this, but fortunately it's just furniture. It can be replaced, and it will be, on the moving company's dime. It looks like one of the 17 wooden crates that our stuff was packed into was either dropped or something was dropped onto it. There was a gash in the side of the crate, and the crate didn't stand up straight, it tilted a little. I took plenty of pictures.

So far, the house is fairly unpacked. When you have 17,000 pounds of "stuff", it takes a while for everything to find its new "home" in the house. We're hoping to be in this house for a good while - at least 3 years, but we're actually hoping for a little longer - so the plan is to place this stuff in its "home" and then not move it for a long, long time.

School starts next week. Boy, are we all ready for that! I love these kids more than life, but we need a break from each other. They need to start school and make new friends, and have a life outside the house. I've been networking and trying to work the new-job angle, but it's not happening as quickly as I would like. I guess that I need to have more patience and more faith, but it is a constant struggle for me. I know that God will help me, I know He has a plan. I just need to wait for it (while trying to do everything I can to market myself and find that perfect job.)

In the meantime, unpacking continues, and I am starting to run again. Gotta get back out there and do something for Tiffany...

Getting back to "normal", one day at a time...

So, we made the move. Left Hawaii and spent some time in Ohio with family and friends that we hadn't seen in a long while.

Then, about a week and a half ago, we made it to our new destination. Virginia.

Since then, we've:

* found a house to rent. Housing on post has a crazy 12+ month waitlist. That is insane, and a rant that I will save for another day. We decided that we aren't ready to buy yet, but that's ok. We found a great house, in a great neighborhood with great schools, and the owners are retired military with ties to Ohio (OH-IO!).

*started getting familiar with Northern Virginia and DC. It is a crazy, overwhelming place, but slowly I am figuring out how to get here and there, and learning to avoid the freeways as much as possible. It is definitely an adjustment that will take some time.

* started the job hunt. It is a slow, arduous process. I don't think I'll be lucky enough to work at home, at least not at first, but to find a job in my field is something that I won't take for granted. We'll figure it out, we always do...

* had our convertible devliered to us from Hawaii (the day after we got here) and picked up the van in Baltimore last week. It is a BIG deal to the Heffners to have our own vehicles back. For those of you that don't move regularly, or haven't moved in years, I cannot begin to explain the joy I feel when I see my belongings. It's not the belongings themselves that are important to me, it is the comfort of having familiar things around you. Seeing our own vehicles makes us feel that much more at peace in a new place.

* Enrolled Abby in school, and made appointments to enroll the other 2 kids. Yes, you need appointments to enroll your child in school. I don't claim to know why, I am just following the rules.

* Registered everyone at the Army hospital here so we can get medical appointments.

* Made appointments for all 3 kids to have physicals - which VA requires before your child can actually attend school. Thankfully, we got appointments for dates before school actually starts, which is a blessing.

* spent the last 10 days (and the next 10 as well) in a hotel. Granted, it's a nice hotel, the price is decent, and they have breakfast everyday. But it's close quarters for a family of 5 and I am ready to have a place to settle into on a more permanent basis.

Life is getting back to "normal", one step at a time. It is a slow process, since we're coming from across the ocean. And the Army hasn't made it easy for us. There have been many hurdles, and I am flabbergasted at the amount of people who we meet who are supposed to be working for the government, providing answers to soldiers and their families, who say to us, "I can't help you." Really? Does the Army know that you can't help me? I wonder if they would be surprised.

I am planning to write to my Congressman a letter. Will it help? Most likely not. But, if I don't write, I will never know.

For now, the blog won't move - you'll still find us at this URL. After we're settled, I may change the name. If I do, I'll be sure my (few) readers will be able to find me.

Until then, I will post as much as possible. Our cell phones will stay the same. Stay in touch!

Moving, Moving, Moving....

So, we're on day 3 of packing and moving. The house is practically empty, except for our small shipment (to go later this week) and all the stuff we have to fit into 8 suitcases. I think the movers will finish today and we'll have tomorrow to reflect on our empty house, the memories, and the plans we've got for the next phase of Casa Heffner. (Not to mention the 2 loads of laundry we've accumulated in the last week and the trips to the dump that need to happen, and picking up school records...I could go on and on...)

It's always strange to me, to see an empty house that we lived in just days before. There's no trace that the Heffners ever called this place their home. No evidence that we loved it here, cared for it like it was our own. We laughed and cried here, had "firsts" here, and made memories.

The reality of this move won't hit for a while because we'll be on an extended vacation for most of July, visiting family and friends and cruising around Hawaii (not in that order...) When we finally get to our destination in early August, and have to live in a hotel and navigate a new place and decide quickly where to live, the reality will hit, and hit hard. No Ms. Tania to bring us brownies, no Willa and Violet asking if the girls can play. No Elena yelling "Levi!" and no Jackson or Matthew giggling at Park Day. No beach down the street or having to take off our shoes to enter the house.

This move is strange in many ways. It's like the old days, where I didn't have the security of a job to bring with me. Where there was a lot of uncertainty - a LOT. But it's better, because we know we made the most of our time here. We saw the sights, we got out of the house at every opportunity, we took advantage of what Hawaii has to offer. We made memories here that all our children will treasure. We made friends that I hope to still be close to, many years from now. After the Army isn't our life anymore and our home is really our home, and not just a stop along the way. We had a really great run here, and as scared as I am about finding a place to live and a decent job, it's time to go.

You have no idea how long we waited for the Army to send us that stupid paper, how we waited for 'permission' to move. But now that it's here, it's much harder than I ever imagined. Harder to say goodbye to a place that is expensive and far from Ohio, but that gave us an amazing 2 1/2 years. A place we may never see again.

So as June moves into July and the world keeps on going, despite my fears about housing and work and the kids getting settled, I am confident that it'll be ok. God never leaves me, especially when I need Him the most. When I can't sleep and all I can think about is "How will we get everything worked out the way we need it to be?" I don't always hear the answer when I am supposed to, but it's there. I feel it. He always knows what I need, and somehow He provides. I am constantly amazed at that. And I strive to be confident that He'll be there again, helping us get settled into our new life.

As the Heffners move from this chapter of our life to another, I hope that you'll stay along for the ride. The blog will change and the posts will be less than normal over the next month or 2, but the new adventures will be chronicled as we get settled and hit the ground running. Stay tuned!

June 1, 2010

June 1, 2010. My first day of unemployment in over 9 years.

It felt weird, and great, and scary.

In some ways, I feel as though I have let Jon down. This layoff wasn't my fault, it isn't personal, it wasn't anything I did wrong. But I'm not contrbuting to the family finances right now. That doesn't hurt us too much, actually, we're in a good place. But it feels so strange. I feel like I owe it to our family to contribute to our needs.

I have always worked, with the exception of a small window of time in Germany, and I was volunteering then. Jon tells people that I get restless and make the family unhappy when I'm at home too much. I worry that he's right.

I have sent out some resumes, and started the networking process. But since we aren't in our new location yet, that's about all I can do for now.

Yesterday Alissa and I commemorated the first day of unemployment by spending the day together. We ran errands and listened to the "Glee" soundtracks together, and laughed and ate lunch. I treasure these small moments with her, and it reminds me of times that I spent with my mom at her age. When she's not in a teenager mood, she is fun and fabulous to be around.

Today I file for unemployment and Alissa and I hit the beach. I want to chill out and forget that I'm upset with IBM and not think about "how and when am I gonna get another job"?

Just for today, I am letting God handle the worry for me. I need a break. And although I'm not sure I deserve one - I mean, I am pretty tough on myself - I am taking a break with Alissa and getting out of this house for a while.

In fact, I hear her moving around upstairs so I bet she'll come down momentarily, in her skinny strapless bathingsuit and wonder if I'm ready to hit the beach.

"Coming, Alissa..."

It's Here...

Tomorrow's my last day at work. It's bittersweet. I have given SO much to this job over the past 5 years. It has eaten into my family time, and I have lost dozens of hours of sleep due to late night calls and issues. I have fixed dozens of issues without even a "Thanks for your hard work." I give my all every single day.

It didn't matter. They didn't care about my work record or my outstanding performance reviews, or the awards I'd won in the last 5 years. They dropped me, and a few thousand others, because I didn't want to move. Well, I couldn't, really. We won't separate our family for the sake of a job, and Jon goes where the Army tells him to.

Where he goes, I go. It's as simple as that.

I won't miss the job itself - I have said for years that I don't want to be an antivirus administrator for the rest of my life. I won't miss the long hours, the "it's not my job" mentality, the calls at 2 am (even when I am supposed to be on vacation!).

I will miss working at home. It was a blessing, to be able to be here for the kids and work at the same time.

I have decided to take the next couple months to chill, re-group, and spend time with the kids at the beach. I need to think about what I will do next.

I have started networking, but we need to get settled in a new house in a new city before I can start back to work. I'm even considering going back to school for a Master's Degree. For years, I have wanted to be a college professor, and I am really considering pursuing that.

The next few months will be tough - moving, leaving our friends, waiting for our stuff to arrive from Hawaii, new schools, new town, different everything. And no job.

I pray and pray that that will just be temporary. I humbly ask that you pray for it, too.

May's half over!

I told you, life at Casa Heffner is busy every May. So many things going on, so little days in the month to complete them!

Abby's recital was last weekend. She did spectacular. They had a routine with umbrellas. It was precious, and all 10 girls did really well. Ms. Nataliya should be very proud.

We're taking a short hiatus from ballet as we prepare to move to.....

Virginia!

Well, it's not final yet. But it should be tomorrow. The PA job was given to someone else. Not that Jon wasn't totally qualified for it. I guess the assignments guy offered it to more than one person, and that person was before Jon.

Figures. Anyway, I'm already over it. I'm already thinking about where we'll live, all the great stuff there is to do in that area - history, museums, daytrips. All of it. I am really excited.

And, it should be great for job prospects as well. I mean, DC has a mecca of IT jobs just waiting to be had.

That's what I'm told, anyway.

Jon and I are both actually really excited about it. It's time for a new adventure. We'll miss things about Hawaii - the weather, the laid-back weekends, the scuba diving, and mostly:

Our 'Ohana.

Still trying to figure out how we'll say goodbye to our friends here. I don't know how we'll do it. I've made friends here that I am closer to than I ever was to a childhood friend. I am a little scared to leave them...

We're kicking around the idea of a great party. A celebration of the 'Ohana, so to speak.

The end of May is in just a few days! And our adventure is beginning soon after. I can't wait.

Well, it's late, really late. I gotta get some sleep. More posts this weekend!

May is a busy month!

Well, so far I have worked 9 OT hours in the last 2 days. Why, you ask? I don't know. I guess I just think it's the right thing to do. (I mean, when I get called in the middle of the night, what else am I supposed to do? Not answer?) I guess I could, but since I have to work the next day, I don't think that will go over very well. It brings me comfort that I am getting paid for this ridiculous overtime, that -- insert company name here -- is paying for what it should be paying for - my ACTUAL work hours. So many times I have worked an extra hour here or there and not claimed it because, well, it's a pain in the butt to do.

Since I was notified of the layoff, however, I claim every single moment. Especially when the phone rings at 2:30 in the morning and I end up working for over 13 hours straight, like yesterday. I can't wait for May 27, when I know the phone will ring, but my cell phone will be turned off. (Note: Family and friends who may need or want to call me that day, please call my home phone #.)

Anyway, besides that work-junk, life is good. Jon is home, here with us, and has no plans to go anywhere (at least that I know of). Saturday he and I took the 2 younger girls bowling at Pearl Harbor. (Alissa went to a birthday party.) Jon won 2 games, and - wait for it - Abby won one game! She loves to bowl. Puts her hands in the air when she rolls the ball. It is cute and sweet and hysterical. She got an 82 for the win (yeah, I know, we are all terrible bowlers if Abby won with an 82, but it's the fun that we had that counts, right?)

Abby bowling at Pearl Harbor, May 1, 2010

Friday the girls and I went to the Hale Koa pool. As I've blogged before, that is such a nice place. The pool is clean, they have nice bathrooms/changing areas, and the water was warm this time! There were some kids there, but it's never really been "crowded" when we go. It is truly worth the 25-minute drive.

gorgeous banyan tree at the Hale Koa Hotel

Tomorrow marks Alex's 12th birthday. It is insane to me that she is 12 already. She's finishing 6th grade in just a few weeks, and she's really changing. She's blossoming, transforming, right before my eyes. She is a great kid, very polite and inquisitve, very caring and sweet. She's been bitten by the babysitting bug, and that to me is also crazy - that she is old enough to watch other children. I still remember the moment I met her as if it were yesterday. I remember the day I found out we were expecting her. After the shock (long story), I was elated. To have another girl in the family. And through her transformations, she has transformed me as well. How lucky we were to have been blessed to be chosen. Chosen by God to be such an important part of her life.

Alex with one of our 'ohana, Matthew, at Park Day. She's a natural!

Friday Jon and I celebrate 16 years of marriage. I know some people might not have expected it to work for us. We met and fell in love very quickly. We were engaged within 6 months, and I was already 5 months pregnant with Alissa on our wedding day. I'm sure people thought we were rushing. But it was meant to be. We still laugh every day, we still hold hands, and Jon kisses me goodbye every single day as he leaves for work. It is a rare thing, love. I mean, lots of people fall in love. But a love that is complete and forgiving and full of laughter and understanding, that is a love that is forever. We have ups and downs, and there are days that I'm sure we both just want to be alone, but we have that forever-love.

So Friday, for our anniversary, Jon and I are ditching work and embarking on a deep-sea wreck dive. I wouldn't want to go with anyone but him. I never dreamed that scuba would be a hobby I'd enjoy, but diving with Jon is peaceful. It's tranquil, and beautiful, and fun. And I know I am safe if he's there. (I'm sure Jon will post pictures to his Facebook later that day...)

There are many brithdays this month - both family and 'ohana. Alissa finishes 10th grade this month, Abby has her 2nd ballet recital, and we will start to prepare to leave this island and embark on a new chapter of our life. My 5-year run at -- insert company name here -- ends, but a new one will come to take its place. One that is less stressful and more enjoyable. One that allows me to grow. I can feel it coming.

May is busy. But it's the best kind of busy. Busy with family, friends, celebrations, and new beginnings.

May your May be blessed as well. Thanks, friends, for being a part of the Heffner journey. Stay tuned as the adventure unfolds!