Thursday, March 11, 2010

Patience is the order of the day...

Ugh. I have never been a patient person. Not patient enough, anyway. When I ask for help (which is pretty much almost never), I ask because I need help now. When I ask the kids to empty the dishwasher, I mean I want them to do it now. When I ask Jon to clean up the junk he leaves in his wake, I want him to clean it up now.

Patience is not my strong suit. It never has been. And two things are bugging me lately...

First, waiting to find out where and when the Army wants us to move is excruciating. We have never found out our next assignment so close to PCS time. (And I say "our", not Jon's, because this affects the lives of all 5 of us, not just Jon.) I could start networking, sending resumes, and finding out where the good school systems are. We could plan the island-hopping cruise we so desperately want - no, NEED - to take before we leave this beautiful state we've called home.

Second, I have no patience for the end of March to get here, when my job will cease and it will all become someone else's problem. I have a bit of "short-timer's disease". I just want it to be over. I don't want to slave away anymore for a job that is dumping me in just a couple of weeks.

***A funny little story - the company that is dumping me like yesterday's trash (along with 3,000 other hard-working individuals) gave me a performance bonus yesterday. The highest amount that I have ever received in my 5 years with them. Sounds backwards, but for this company I can totally see their logic. Not.***

I take comfort in the fact that their ridiculosity will pay for our aforementioned Island-Hopping Cruise for 5. Thank you, ___!

Anyway, those two things cause me the most stress right now. And I am trying like crazy to have enough patience to just push the stress back a little bit. Just a little. But if you know me, you know it's hard for me to let things go.

But today I strive to find the patience. To just be.

I have continued my workouts, though on the elliptical machine this week. It's been rainy and gross here, and I enjoy the elliptical because it forces me to keep going. (When I run outside I sometimes get lazy and slow to a walk because I don't want to push myself enough.) On the elliptical you can't. I mean, you can, but then it starts blinking and the lights change and it's like the machine is mocking me, taunting me. I can somehow always manage to find the willpower to get through the whole programmed workout without slowing down and making it mad. Been on it 4 days in a row now...and it helps with the stress and makes me feel accomplished.

Now if Jon will just stop calling me in the middle of the workout everyday...hee hee.

I made a small deal with myself that I will do some things for me since I'll have weekdays free. So I am working to get in more workouts every week, and I'm planning to take some computer-programming classes (my true love), and next week I'll be taking open-water scuba diving certification class. (I'll fill you in on that one next week!)

Well, back to the grind that is my work-life. I hope that the next job I find is one that I like a whole lot better. (Being let go opened my eyes to the fact that I don't really even like this job, I just keep it because it's convenient and close to home.) Let's hope these programming classes open up my job possibilities...

Happy Thursday Everyone!


Krysti said...

"Patience is a virtue" my mother and grandmother always told me!

A virtue that is that takes some of us longer than others.... I'm a longer learner on this topic toooooo!

Hang in there girl! If for no other reason, than to be too stubborn to give up!

Know that you are not alone in the world of trials and tribulation that try the patience of saints... including Job. :)

This is why Mother's cry at happy occasions! :) Another phenomenon I too am rapidly gaining a better understanding of....

Our girls just laugh.... I tell them; you laugh and you pick on me... you will tear up too... someday.

Your goofy Sister-in-law

Cindy said...

good for you. I am so happy that you are finidng ways to take care of you. I know ou were upset about loosing your job, but look at all the good that has come from this!